I don't know why I can't be happy with anything. I had the best weekend ever. At first I smiled just thinking about it and how right it felt. And then a few hours after that I'm thinking how I don't know when I'll get that back. Or if I will. And how soon they'll all be gone, and then what will I have left?

Because no one else has ever made me feel like that. I really don't want to lose it. Just when I was doing so well at remembering...

But probably not letting myself revel in it is smart. Because it's all temporary, isn't it? All of it.